Who do you love?

I recently saw an old Facebook video from December 2014 that Tyrese Gibson posted where he talked about love and marriage. He brought up a lot of good points but the one thing he said that got me to thinking was “do I love you more than I know you?”. I have to admit I had to scratch my head on that one because most people jump into marriage based on the idea that they don’t want to be lonely without really spending time getting to know each other and that’s where he was going with that question but I had to challenge myself to dig a little deeper.

Do I love you more than I know and love myself?

Let’s paint the scene-two people meet, date, fall in love and decide to live live together as husband and wife. They stand in front of the preacher and pronounce to their friends, family and God that they promise to be together until death do they part. Fast forward 10 years and now they are sitting in front of a judge at separate tables in a courtroom fighting over children, money, houses waiting for the final decree of divorce to be filed. What happened? Did they see things about the other person they never knew were there? Or is it that they never spent enough time with themselves to learn who they are and to love who they are?

Over and over again the bible talks about knowing and loving yourself through God’s eyes. The woman at the well experienced that when she talked with Jesus and saw that even through her multiple husband’s Jesus saw her as someone to be valued and He forgave her sins. (John 4:9-29) Joseph showed it when he held onto the dream that God had given him. (Genesis 37-50) Both the woman at the well and Joseph, while getting to know themselves, spent time with God. The danger with not spending time with God, not knowing who we are and not loving who we are is that we lose ourselves in trying to please others. I know because that was me a few months ago. My thought process was if I did what I thought people wanted that would be showing love but I wasn’t happy because my love wasn’t genuine. It was guarded and I thought it was keeping me protected but that wasn’t God’s love. God’s love is not guarded; it is bold and honest and true.

So as you sit here reading this think about the relationships in your life-family, friends, church, etc., and ask yourself this question… Am I loving you more than I know and love myself?


3 thoughts on “Who do you love?

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