Archive | August 2017

White As Snow

I have recently started watching a Youtube channel, Ashley Empowers and I must say that I am so glad that I did. One of the series she has on her channel is called Dating With Purpose. She sits down with married couples and asks them about their relationship, how they dated with marriage in mind and how they kept their relationship pure leading up to their wedding. The first video wasn’t her interviewing a married couple but a mother and daughter speaking about their particular relationships with their husbands. I was immediately hooked and as I watched video after video I realized that they all had one thing in common – boundaries. Boundaries for them personally and for them as a couple. Those boundaries are what helped them remember what they were striving for when faced with the temptation to have sex.

I know the consequences of giving in to that temptation. You can feel disconnected from God and start thinking that you’re not good enough. That because you’ve fallen no man is going to want to be with you. That you might as well settle for something less because desiring and living for something more is too hard.


Well that’s not entirely true. Yes it’s difficult to hold onto your standards but it’s so worth it. People may think you’re crazy. People may tell you that it’s not normal to wait. People may say that as a single person you should be living it up but here’s the thing-“people” aren’t the one’s living your life and they aren’t the ones who gave you life in the first place. Holding onto your desire to live a life free of sexual sin starts long before you get into a relationship with someone and it’s not just refraining from sex.

As with a lot of things in our life, sexual desire starts in our minds. That’s why God’s word tells us to pay attention to what we hear and see. Whatever we see or hear goes into our minds and beings to shape our thoughts. If we are constantly exposing ourselves to sexually explicit music, movies, t.v. shows or books it becomes harder and harder to stay sexually pure. I’m not saying this because I’ve heard it somewhere I’m saying this out of experience.

The other day I was listening to a song my Mint Condition and it brought be right back to my first apartment. I was listening to the song as the person I’d finished having sex with was getting dressed to go back to his house. I got my first apartment in my early twenties but all these years later I’m immediately pulled back into that scene just because of the memory that song evokes. And believe me when I tell you that’s just a sample of the books, music or movies I’ve read, heard or watched that hold some memory for me.

I want my body to a be a living sacrifice for God and the only way for me to do that is to deny my flesh and submit to the will of God. The more I’m able to do this while I’m single the more I’ll be able to do this when I’m married.

For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. (Romans 8:6)

photo credit: aqua.mech <a href=”″>abstract water splash isolated on white</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

It’s Not What You See…It’s How You Look At It

I almost fell into the trap. You know the one where you start looking at things and being to think that what you have isn’t enough. The one that tempts you into making purchases you can’t afford. Like looking into moving out of the home that you love because you want an updated bathroom or a pantry in the kitchen. Really, Melissa? Moving for a pantry? Well, it has crossed my mind but thankfully over the last few days I’ve come to my senses.

I have been in my home for 6 years now and I started to think that I’d outgrown the nearly 1500 square feet of my one level town home. I know, I know sound’s silly right? How could little old me outgrow 1500 square feet? Well, I really haven’t outgrown my home I was just looking at it with the wrong eyes. After 6 years I became complacent and I started to take everything for granted. I remember when I started my house hunting venture. I wasn’t to particular on location, except I didn’t want to be in Brooklyn Park (it takes my mother to talk about that considering that’s where I ended up) but I did have some things I absolutely had to have and God answered that prayer.

So why exactly have I begun to think my God answered home is no longer good enough? Because once again I wasn’t really looking at my home. I stopped seeing the best and started seeing the negative and worse I started to complain about the negative. No I don’t have a pantry but guess what I have more than enough space especially if I rearrange some things in my kitchen (again it takes my mom to talk about my storage container cabinet).

God wants us to think on the good things about life-not that we should live in a rose-colored world but we also shouldn’t dwell on the imperfections of life. This doesn’t just apply to homes but to other aspects like relationships, jobs, finances. Too many times we make decisions based on the surface instead of digging deeper and I for one have decided to try to look at things in a different light.


photo credit: Pascal Volk <a href=”″>Eyes of the coffee mug</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;